As this portion of my summer comes to a close I am gathering up all the parts of me that have grown and viewing the woman God re-created this summer. He spent a year ripping out each individual thread of my being so He could stitch me back together following His pattern instead of my own sloppy one.
Revelation 7:9-10
"After this I looked and there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and in front of the Lamb. They were wearing white robes and were holding palm branches in their hands. And they cried out in a loud voice: 'Salvation belongs to our God, who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb.'"
I have felt a sense of homesickness for my eternal home before, missing my Abba Father and longing for the day when the pain and salty tears of the earth will leave me forever. But more than that, as we discussed those verses in Revelation last night, I realized that I miss my sweet sweet Jesus. I’ve identified the feeling of homesickness for my true home and the peace it will bring. I’ve understood that I miss God the Father, my Daddy in Heaven; I take joy and comfort in the Holy Spirit’s constant presence; but Jesus is in Heaven and last night I was struck with an intense missing Him.
When I leave here on Monday I will miss the relationships I’ve formed here. I currently miss my school friends, my sister, and most of all my mom. Those people all know me so well and that’s why I do and will miss them. I desire the comfort that comes from having your loved one’s close by. More than anyone on earth Jesus knows my heart to it’s very fullest. He took my sin and not only saw it, but also felt it, experienced it, suffered and died for it. He took the full blame and the full punishment for it. He knows the sins even I can’t remember and sees the depth of the sin I’ll never admit to anyone. And yet, after all that, He keeps no record of my wrongs. He doesn’t harbor anger or hostility towards me for the price my sin cost Him. He isn’t self-righteous, though He has every right to be. My Jesus Messiah doesn’t shun me with the knowledge of the darkest pits and depths of my sin. He embraces the rotten, filthy, dank pit that is my soul and fills it with His love till it’s overflowing. My selfish pride, vanity, gossiping, etc, held him bound by nails to a cross for gut-wrenching hours and somehow He sits in heaven today fully understanding all of that and pouring His love in heaps and bounds out on me anyway.
How could I not miss such an indescribable perfect Savior? What a glorious day it will be when I am given that white robe to forever truly offer my entire self to worship my Jesus Messiah, Name above all names.
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